INT. A PARTY FULL OF ACQUAINTANCES
MAXWELL
Oh, hi! Good to see you, how’ve you been?
LAURA
Let’s skip the pleasantries.
MAXWELL
(Confused)
LAURA
You unfollowed me. Subtext reads: we are no longer friends.
MAXWELL
So when I followed you, did that make us friends?
LAURA
All you do is post pictures of your kid eating cashews out of a plastic cup and I still follow you.
MAXWELL
Does it really matter that it’s out of a plastic cup?
LAURA
How do you know that Marcus wants to be seen eating sliced oranges in his underwear with juice running down his face? One day he will pissed.
SAMANTHA ENTERS.
SAMANTHA
Who has juice running down his face?
LAURA
Maxwell’s son. Constantly.
MAXWELL
Laura is accusing me of pimping out Marcus because she’s a dramatic narcissist who doesn’t understand the tacit rules of social media.
SAMANTHA
Wait, you confronted him about an unfollow? Bold, Laura.
LAURA
Why not! He’s an environmentally challenged son-pimper! Like ExxonMobil meets Joe Jackson.
MAXWELL
(about Laura)
Is she having a mental breakdown?
SAMANTHA
It’s safe to say her therapist knows about you.
LAURA
Only by handle, don’t flatter yourself.
THE END.